November 7th, 2016
“The greatest thing you'll ever learn is to love and be loved, just to love and be loved.” - Eden Ahbez
We all have a desire and need to feel love for ourselves, for a significant other, and to be loved in return. This inherent need is part of just being human, and the need for acceptance, touch and empathy is a basic right of just being alive. From a spiritual or metaphysical persperctive, we’re always in relationship with something – ourselves with our feelings and thoughts, our environment, Nature, and other people. There can be growth when spending time in solitude, following a spiritual practice or using the tools of self-inquiry or meditation to look deeper within. This often is cyclical, and we eventually our curiosity and desire for connection drives us to seek the companionship.
Recently I invited people on my mailing list and on social media to participate in a two-fold survey. There were two areas I wanted feedback on: spirituality, spiritual practices and spiritual or shamanic “emergence.”, and intimate relationships and partnering, and the responses to this category were very revealing for me.
The number one challenge-issue-fear was around trust. Over 90% of the respondents cited this factor above all else, including communication, cooperation, or sexual intimacy issues. Trusting the other or one’s own motivations, even surrendering to love itself and all the vulnerability it demands is demands that we deal with our own anxieties, insecurities and woundings from past dissapointments, betrayals or abuse. Some of the respondents also cited difficulties with communication, fears of losing oneself in the other, or experiencing the polarity of abandonment or suffocation.
Our way of relating and being in relationship is predicated on the models we learned through our upbringing and the messages from our cultures. These have conditioned our behaviours in how we connect and relate at any age. Sometimes the memories in our soul, or in our parent’s unhealed events with their upbringing, brings us into contact with unhealthy patterns. Co-dependency, broken attachments with one parent or another can cause to unconsciously attract the exact opposite situations that we’re really desiring.
My direct experiences and observations during the last 10 years or so tells me that many of these patterns and beliefs, as well as our relationships themselves, are under pressure to change. There are many more people who are becoming weary with any superficiality in their relationships and love connections, and I’ve seen a profound increase in the interest in soulmate, soul-based partnerships. There’s also a growing awareness of the phenomenon of twin flames and twin souls. This is becoming an area of interest that isn’t just about finding the perfect partner – it has broader spiritual implications and potentials. Just Google these terms and conduct your own research if you’re curious.
I would also add to this discourse the language and science of astrology which I see as a big part of the changes in relationship these days.
The end of the Mayan Calendar in 2012 ushered in the first of the Uranus-Pluto Squares. Uranus entered the sign of Aries in March, 2011, the sign of the warrior and being more individualized and independent. Between June 2012 and March of 2015 there were 7]seven exact contacts through Pluto and Uranus being in a square aspect, which is Mastery through Challenge. I personally went through a deep spiritual transformation via the disintegration of a long-term partnership and a rebirth into envisioning a newer and more egalitarian partnership model and opportunity.
The bottom line here is that so many of the issues coming up within relationships now are asking us to grow and let go of many of our dysfunctional ways of being so that we can actually come in to a real and experiential equality with those we are in closest resonance with, and really explore conscious relating and mutually supportive and creative ways for helping each other to express our deepest gifts for the benefits of others, and manifest our desires and Soul Mission.
My orientation is that our spirituality, creativity, sensitivity and sexuality are all intertwined in this transformative process. Once we have grounded fully within ourselves without shame or guilt, then our vibration changes and we begin to attract those who will mirror with us in love, harmony, abundance, and yes, in complete trust. It is also the foundation for building a fair and equitable economic system, sustainable communities, and a healthy relationship with our home planet.
If you would like to explore more about my approach to attracting and cocreating conscious relationships full of trust and deeper potential for intimacy, then I would like invite you to schedule a Discovery Call with me. I’d love to assist you in letting go of past limitations and embrace a path of happiness and fulillment. Simply click here to go to the scheduling page on my website, or contact me directly via the email of phone info below.
Watch for next week’s installment where I’ll share with you some approaches and techniques for addressing the issues and challenges you may have been going through, and some ideas on how to create more “Heart and Soul” in your relationship life.
Soul Mentoring and Astrological Coaching
UK Phone: +44 (0) 7875 123406